You know you should be âdoing more dating.â But youâve never done online dating before. Maybe youâve even heard horror stories.
If you knew exactly what to do or how to do it, your calendar would be full of dates to the Brooklyn Botanical Garden and glamorous exhibit openings on the Upper East Side.
(And itâs not that youâre a control freak⊠but you donât want to hire a professional matchmaker, because no one else really knows your taste like you do.)
Honestly, too much of the time you spend on âfinding a partnerâ is spent buying clothes for dates, scrolling the personal ads, and agonizing over whether to answer.
You need to get out of your own way and just DO MORE ONLINE DATING STUFF.
Imagine how great your online dating life would be if you just worked on it for an hour a week!
If you donât know what you should be doing, weâll tell you. If you already know what to do, weâll help you draw up an action plan. And then, as you go on more and more dates, we'll help you revise that plan. đ
Bootcamp lasts two months. Three dates in the first two months guaranteed.
NYC Online Dating Bootcamp will hold you to a schedule of one meeting with an online dating coach each week to make meaningful progress on your dating life.
Meet Lydia: founder of NYC Online Dating Bootcamp
Look at this goofball!
Hi, I'm Lydia (software engineer, Yale â12). I met my husband on Tinder after ten long years of online dating. Every online dating catastrophe that you can think of, I have experienced firsthand. But I'm convinced that online dating is still the best way to find your person.
The first person I ever convinced to do online dating was my mom, who was struggling to meet men in real life.
One morning she came over for breakfast, and I begged her to try Bumble. "I'll create a profile for you while you take a shower," I told her.
Exactly twenty minutes later, I handed the phone back to her and said, "Alright, you have two dates lined up for Saturday. One of the guys has a law degree, and the other is a super handsome flight mechanic."
Needless to say, she was a quick convert (and is currently dating three guys she met online!).
Bootcamp Content and Goals
1. Write your new profile.
A great dating profile is like a great book blurb: snappy, smart, and not too self serious.
When it comes to profiles, we rarely â and almost never â see good ones. Men, pfft! They litter their profiles with so many fishing trip photos you'd think striped bass sells for the same price as plutonium. And women? They say they love being outdoors and traveling, but they never describe what itâs actually LIKE sitting in a living room with them for six hours. People, people, people: you need to catch âem with a hook and then TELL them what youâre actually like. Are you a conspiracy theorist who thinks Monica Lewinsky is actually Simone de Beauvoirâs secret granddaughter? Then SAY that. (Actually, that would start a lot of conversations.)
2. Learn how to swipe liberally and message directly.
Depending on what youâre looking for, weâll choose an app that meets your goals. And yes, we'll work through all the computer setup for you, so that you're not spending hours banging your head against a wall.
Weâll also devise a âworkoutâ plan for swipes per day. (Hint: finding matches takes a LOT of swipes, even for the Robert Redford and Jane Fonda lookalikes among us.)
Once you have a match, it's important to separate the wheat from the chaff quickly. Sending your matches a hard-hitting message up front ("Do you believe that Simone de Beauvoirâs love child lives among us today?") (just kidding) will narrow down your options quickly.
3. Go on lots of dates. Then rinse and repeat.
Dating is a numbers game, not a self improvement game.
Realize that you are ready to date AS YOU ARE. You do not need professional photographs taken, you do not need new clothes. Everyone else on the apps is just like you: imperfect and searching for someone who makes them feel at ease.
That being said, we tell our clients again and again: you should date AT LEAST two â heck, sometimes even five â people at any given time. We can't explain exactly why, but doing so helps our clients relieve their anxiety about upcoming dates, and lets them "be themselves" on a date. (If you're wondering how on earth we're going to schedule five dates for you, go back to #2.)
4. Refine your profile.
By this point, youâll have been on a handful of dates. Weâll take what you learned from these dates and refine your profile to ensure that you get more of the dates that you like, and fewer of the ones you didnât.
Your person is out there. Letâs find them together.
NYC Online Dating Bootcamp is high-level dating expertise on tap.
Itâs a simple idea with profound impact: for two months, you'll attend a thirty-minute weekly Zoom call with a dating coach to get more â and better â results from your online dating efforts.
